Scanxiety - the fear and anxiety related to cancer check-ups
Next week Friday, I am going for my three-monthly breast cancer check-up. The fear and anxiety that I experience during the time leading up to these check-ups can be disabling. Thousands of 'what ifs' occupy my thoughts. I have disturbing dreams, don't sleep well, and feel generally demotivated. Last week I decided to call my psychologist for a consultation, and yesterday we discussed my fears and feelings. Although I now better understand why I'm feeling the way I do, it does not take away the anxiety that I experience. When I'm anxious, I get grumpy and snap at everyone around me. I struggle to concentrate and make mistakes that I wouldn't usually make. I eat more, which makes me depressed because I cannot shake off the 20 kg I gained during chemotherapy. And, as a result, I eat even more! I stop caring for myself; taking a shower is a massive chore that drains the little strength I have. All my energy goes into worrying about something that I have no control...